6.12.2008

"Your mom has a sweet pair of Vans..."

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I'm a loyalist.

It's been years and years of me wearing this brand...these beautiful Vans. It's been a lovely walk down the road together. That's right, I've been wearing Vans ever since some of you were still getting your butts routinely wiped by your mama. That was so good I had to bite my own line and say it twice. I just wanted to share a glimpse into my madness.

My pile of Vans has grown every so slightly.

A few questions you might be pondering...

Q: How can she afford to buy Vans for all them chil'rens?
A: Its called birthday queries ("So what does mijo need for his birthday?" or "I'm not buying them toys--only stuff they need!"), gift cards and Ross. Ross sometimes carries Vans and I'm like...score.

Q: How do the shoes manage to stay clean and in good condition?
A: I am a shoe Nazi. There are rules. "Good shoes" i.e. Vans or anything that cost me over $35 to buy, will not be worn around the house...while playing outside...while riding bikes...while working on the yard...riding a skateboard...getting dirty. Raggedy shoes from Target, Old Navy, Payless or Ross will fill that capacity.

Q: Where do they store all these shoes?
A: This isn't it. There are others. Chucks, sandals, Airwalks, boots. We won't get into the girls shoes. Currently, I live in a four bedroom cave house. That means I have two kids per room. All shoes are in mountainous piles at the bottom of their closets. I tried that hanging shoe pocket thingie and they usually break because it gets too heavy from all the shoes. Every time we have to leave the house, I am ready to chop heads because I can usually only find one shoe of the pair.

You'll hear alot of this, "Fiiiiiiinnnnnndddddd the other shoe noooooooooooooowwwww!"

Q: Do the children want to wear Vans and if so, do they pick them out?
A: Why, I've never bothered to ask them. The children don't have a choice as to what type of shoe they wear because they are under 18 and have no money to purchase them. Maybe I will be slightly flexible about letting them choose the style, but that is very rare and I have to be just fed (preferably Cinnabon or that Mongolian spot at the Galleria) and in a good mood. Heh.

I can still manipulate and indoctrinate them cuz they are all under the age of ten. And they passed through my birth canal. B o o y a h.

I counted about seventeen pairs of Vans. That is not counting the passed down, funky slip-ons that the chil'rens play in. I didn't bother to include them in the pictures because they were pretty busted. They are faded, holey, and have be worn by two or more of the boys. They have been valiant little soldiers. Soldiers for the feet, if you will.

You got to give props to a shoe that can outlast the chil'rens.

Xixi...perusing the Vans and wondering why her crazy mama decided to put all the Vans on the coffee table and take a picture of them.
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