The bustle in my hustle.

So we are standing around a parking lot in Huntington Beach, by tower #10 if you really must know. All the tanned, toned and bikinied bodies on beach cruisers have settled by the fire pits.

We are chatting and contemplating doing smores or just going home, which for me entails starting the assembly line of baths. My vote was let's just going home. It's no fun to wake up sleeping but sandy chil'rens and plunging their startled little behinds into the shower. They cry and whine and throw tantrums because they are so tired. Little do they know how close I am from crying, whining, and throwing a tantrum alongside them. So I figure, let's just get it over with already.

As I am leaning against Papa's truck, I feel someone poke me in the butt with their finger. It was my little brother, Josh. I was wearing a cover up over my thong bathing suit. So I was plenty decent. He says,

"Dee, take off your bustle! Who are you trying to impress?"

So we all start giggling. You know...the bustle...big butt that looks like a bustle....hahahaha. Hilarious. Then a conversation begins about how big my booty is, how it's always been big but never this big, how nice I would look if I would drop, say, a hundred pounds or so, etc. etc. All this is being discussed in a very casual and lighthearted manner because it's topic that's been discussed oh, about a thousand times in my lifetime.

That is my mom's crusade, to get me to lose weight...to shrink my butt and hips down somehow. Always has been. Probably always will be. The only person who would combat my mom was my Nana, God rest her beautiful soul. She would say, "Ahhh, Luisa. Leave her alone. She's fine. She will lose weight when she is ready. She gets those big nalgas from her Dad's side."

I have vowed that I would use this booty for good, not evil. And I have! Look, I am happily married to a man who is happy and loves my big booty. The chil'rens love to use my booty as a cushion when they watch TV or when they want to cuddle.

Interestingly enough, I am the first person people call out to whenever booty music is being played.

Edited to add: Those of you that caught my booty picture while it was still up, consider yourselves lucky you got an eyefull. The Man made me take it down. Shoot. Struck down while I was just gettin' started. I could have been the next Buffy the Body or Deelishis.

Heh.